My Testimony

“They overcame him by the blood of the lamb and the word of their testimony” ~ Rev 12:11

The month of June brings about Father’s Day, and I wanted to commemorate this on that day, to show the wonderful eternal FATHER I’m blessed to have - My GOD❤️ 1 John 4:19 - “We love HIM because HE first loved us.” John 3:16

Short background. I was born and raised Catholic, didn’t really understand what “born again” life really meant. To me it was those people who talk about the Bible more and miss out on life and aren’t “cool.” More like the “too religious people” and I naturally wasn’t. I started going to Moravian church with my grandma at one point. Came forward to give my life to CHRIST, but never really knew what that meant, as I look back. My GOD has been faithful 🙏

As a young child having gotten communion and confirmation in the Catholic church, it dawned on me one day, to question as to why we worshipped Mary and the statues because we’re not to bow down to idols (10 Commandment). I didn’t realize that was THE HOLY SPIRIT speaking to me, bearing witness with what is in Scriptures.

I went through life not really knowing much about the Bible, neither reading it for myself.

I came to the U.S for college and little did I know that my life was going to change. This had to do with meeting JESUS, and the truth that I found as a result of engaging with the Seventh Day Adventist faith.

Growing up, all I knew was SDAs don’t attend school or work on Saturday. However, the first curiosity I would say towards SDA sparked sometime in 2012. I knew of the existence of SDA but didn’t know what sets them apart? Someone who used to come to our house, one day shared a leaflet I think. I later on read it and there was a mention of a sunday law, and I remember wondering what is so special about these people that they will be affected by this sunday law. I also remember praying to GOD that when His Angel passes to seal His people, that may He please not pass me by. I later forgot about it and just went on with life.

I attended Shaaban Robert for all my high school and I found myself liking both - the world and JESUS, but I didn’t really know about JESUS, partly because I have a Catholic background, and I couldn’t understand the wave of born again churches. To me being born again was just another denomination. I had thought, I could do whatever I want and be Christian or choose to be born again and loose my “liberties” and be “different”, in which I didn’t like to be different. I liked being popular and so forth...

I remember going to summer camps (not held by Shaaban) but they were Christian in nature and I used to enjoy them, but it was interesting that some of the kids I would sing praises with at camp, would meet them in the worldly places. Even more so would make me want to think oh well it’s all fine. Then I remember listening to certain preacher that brought conviction towards my lifestyle, and I made a certain change but it was more out of fear, though it was also I didn’t want to disappoint JESUS because I used to pray for all my exams and owed my understanding in school to Him. Even though I wouldn’t share that with my “peers” at the time.

Then I came to the US for school in 2012. I had planned to do things differently, and I remember thinking I want to get close to GOD because I believed He opened the door for me to come here (that was my thinking then) So, I went to a Lutheran church, and they served alcoholic wine for communion and that put me off. I didn’t want to go there anymore. Later on, a person I was told of while in Tanzania was a SDA. A series of events took place, then one day I told the person I wanted to visit his church. That was my first SDA Church experience. The smiles were vibrant, the message good. The person who picked my friend and I up was not an everyday person you meet. This person never stopped glorifying GOD. I even remember thinking to myself how is his head always dwelling on that (as if it’s a bad thing- when I look at that incident today, it just reveals how the natural mind functions that it is not subject to GOD and it’s true) without the HOLY SPIRIT and thus abiding in CHRIST moment by moment the mind would not just by itself wander towards GOD. We have to deny ourselves and submit the mind. This is only a joy to do if the mind is converted otherwise it would be such a burdensome thing to do.

As a result of the meeting, led to Bible studies. I was impressed when the Pastor encouraged to read for oneself and then come with questions. With a Catholic background that was unheard of, and the Pastor presented to me coming to my level because in my mind I was always the feeble who knows nothing, and the Pastors know it all (what do I have to look/read and ask the Pastor instead of just yes and amen)

I was then introduced to the health message and became vegan. The SDA Church is really blessed with wealth of knowledge. It’s amazing.

Then, I needed to switch schools. I was still young in the faith and I did. Continued reading, and went to a Baptist school, talk about being alone in a valley of “Christians” on campus. I had good small group of people from church I could talk with, but it was not my everyday fellow students. I was a whole different person. I adapted the dress reform and was learning of JESUS. What was different was I read my Bible, something I didn’t use to do. I also enjoy writing, so I wrote a lot.

I also had great spiritual parent. Being alone on campus, and still forming started taking a tall on me, and about towards the end of 2015, I started neglecting my worship time. I remember having these intense sad feelings over neglecting that special time. I remember some friends from Tanzania that when I rode in their car, they would play secular music before I knew it I started singing as well. Then life took a downturn. I went back to the fashions of this world, and wanting all the attention. I didn’t stop going to church, but I went as a tradition, not out of my relationship with GOD. Started going late too. Turned on the tv to get the entertainment from this world but there was always a void, but at this point because in my mind I had not denied JESUS, I didn’t realize what changed my life was the relationship not church attendance and all the little things I could do on my own. So then years went by, and one day I was just tired, I remember different times I would feel a deep sense of conviction to read my Bible and I would (at this point I wasn’t even reading my Bible) I had picked other idols (unbeknownst to myself)

So one day, I remember it dawning on me that “I have the form of godliness, denying the power thereof” I didn’t quite understand but it was something I knew is described on what the hearts of men would be in the end times. At this point, one day I had thought- well i’m tired of this, just going to church and going through the motions. Then what next? I remember even crying out to GOD to help me. I didn’t like some of the things I picked and the decisions I made. I needed help. As a result, GOD did a huge miracle

I was going to visit my church family (the ones I met in 2012) but I had not fully communicated with them for awhile, because I would say that I didn’t want to deal with life, and the drastic changes I had made- I believe (i’m still not sure why I stopped communicating)

How I ended up making the trip....

A long time old friend we met in church years before, decided to reach out to me for help in his ministry endeavors in Africa. Particularly Tanzania (wanted me to help translate some workbooks) We then arranged to meet, so he came to where I lived and he just kept telling me about the different people he’s met and his “daughters” and kept saying you could be one of my daughters. So then it just irked me that he kept saying that, that I told him I have a dad and wanted him to talk to my dad (was not referring to my biological dad) rather the man who would pick me up, and gave me Bible studies, I consider him as my dad and his wife my other mom😊 GOD has blessed me with several moms here😊🙏

Anyways he just brought a flash of memories and I wanted to visit my church family, but I also wanted to visit them before but it wouldn’t happen, so this time I didn’t even want to tell them before hand and then fail to go and cancel again...

So a day came and was sure i’ll go, and so I called them and said I was going...the trip felt like it was time and I needed to go, didn’t know why. I also chose to go as I was and not pretend to be who i’m not.

When I arrived, I was welcomed well, and didn’t feel judged. I had several question. It was like my old experience was being revived. the next day was church, I remember I had a question regarding why JESUS told the woman caught in adultery to go and sin no more. Knowing that GOD doesn’t speak idle words, I wanted to know the power thereof to keep one from sinning( unbeknownst to me)

I went to bed that night, and I dreamt, I had written an apology letter (it had to do with saying sorry to my parent for having spent their life pouring unto me truth, and laboring with me and I turned away). The letter was taken well in the dream. In the midst of the dream I heard “wake up thou that sleepest, redeem the time.” I don’t know if you’ve ever experienced where you’re dreaming and you feel like you’re waking up, and then you actually wake up.

I looked at my phone and it was 3am. I would usually sleep like a log, so this was not normal. So I got on my knees and was short of words. I was saying I don’t even know how to pray. I then recited the LORD’s prayer. I then heard, “I AM coming to end this, you need to be ready” I was shaken.

Then I saw an imagery, as though I was outside and there was a campfire and there were demons around and they would toss me back and forth and I heard..

“For without MY grace, they would toil with you back and forth and laugh”

As this is going on. I remembered my question about the woman caught in adultery and because I was recognizing the LORD was here, I asked HIM the question,

The woman caught in adultery- sin no more

This is amazing that I’m praying to you, (then I saw as though I was praying to CHRIST, then He was next to me) and HE said I AM in you. And if I AM in you GOD can not sin.

Something that later I identify with what is said in 1 John 3:6 “Whoever abides in Him does not sin. Whoever sins has neither seen Him nor known Him”

Recognizing that to live out go and sin no more doesn’t and can’t come from own efforts rather in abiding in CHRIST moment by moment.

I then asked, Why are YOU talking to me? I heard, Because you have a willing heart

Also heard, The spirit is willing, the flesh is weak

I was then saying “I’m scared, that I could loose the fight.” And I heard...

Let ME live in you.....

Sin renders you less capable, less inclined, hence let ME live in you.

It was now 2 hours after this was done and I remember seeing as though I was going to get water and my “dad” was reading his Bible and there was an Angel by him.

It was such a pleasant dream that I didn’t want it to end.

The next day was work day, and I tell you to this day all I can say is I call it GOD put me on speed dial. I was praying without stopping, talking to GOD nonstop. I couldn’t understand where that power and desire emerged from but I had an intense determination. All of a sudden i was convicted on what I was wearing and I had intense desire and just put it away. I was having flashbacks of what decisions I was making and I was wondering why in the world was I even considering that? The Netflix that brought me entertainment I didn’t want it. I remember I used to be such a jokester and send endless memes, all of a sudden life got real, and it’s a field, and souls are at stake, and that was the end of it. I remembered how the Bible says no corse jesting, no joking as it increases to more ungodliness. Before this used to feel as a hard saying because I loved those things but now it wasn’t even a matter of thinking through it, rather life just changed in a blink. I was literally a clown on Friday, and a whole different person on Monday. I remember I was at a parking lot sitting in the car and recognizing people are getting lost, it is late in life and tears started flowing. I called my mum pressing her to get her to read and know GOD. It was intense. I was in the training phase at work, and was sharing and this guy asked me to say what I was saying so he could take notes and share with his bible study group, and I was just sharing. I was in the training class but just meditating and writing all these verses that I haven’t looked at for a long time. A wonderful experience that from then on I refuse to let go of my LORD, to let my mind consider anything else better than GOD. But what I’m thankful for is the power of GOD unto salvation. I remember saying this is not normal it feels like my mind is getting rewired. I was asking trying to make the change tangible I couldn’t. It’s a spiritual event. But even more so that novelty has to go on, and i’m thankful to GOD for changing my heart to delight to do HIS will because before that His will was burdensome, my mind was still convinced of the world more than being convinced of the Word. It is a moment by moment experience, and I get to talk to JESUS as my Dear friend and not a theoretical being that I hope is true because He personally came to wake me up, and that changed things for me. It’s so huge in my mind. It is love beyond what I can think of, because I surely didn’t deserve it. Now like before, the battle rages and Revelation 12:17, the warfare is forever on, and I need to stay guarded all the time, because when we place ourselves on the side of CHRIST we enlist all the forces of unregenerated nature backed by the whole host of darkness, and I see it, experience it, and it puts the Bible to truth. Experience changes the Bible from story to reality and things can identify with as it acts as a sure guide for us.